By: Billy BeerSlugger
I think rags are a really superior to paper towels in a lot of ways. You only buy a rag once, you use it as many times as you want and you can throw it in the washing machine or dishwasher if you think it’s got a little too much nastiness on it. If the rag gets so old and ratty that you can’t bear to look at it anymore you can actually use it like a paper towel and throw it out after it’s last use.
So in some instances I’ll go to a friends house for drinks and if there is a spill I’ll quickly reach for the nearest rag, usually hanging on the oven handle or somewhere about the sink. So I was kind of taken aback that when I tried to hand this person the rag that hung on the oven I was rebuffed.
“That’s just there for decoration. We don’t use that as a rag.”
At this point I was thinking, what kind of practical use of a rag is that. It’s up there with Throw Pillows in terms of shit that is completely and utterly unnecessary. It’s a rag, it’s within reach and often the most obvious places you would look for a rag in case something spills but you can’t use it? It is there for show, a faux rag?
If you have a penis and don’t enjoy making out with guys I implore you to stop this practice. A rag only has one purpose, to clean things up. A rag is not a fashion statement even if it goes with your kitchen’s overall motif. If you live with your girlfriend or wife (or mother you loser) it is a perfectly acceptable trade off to keep the girl be happy with a decorative rag. However, if you’re a dude living by yourself or with other dudes and employ decorative rags in the kitchen you might want to get yourself tested for “the gay”.