Social Networking / Dating Profile Pictures – That’s not you?

By: Billy BeerSlugger

While I had to retire from social networking a while back, one thing that I did notice is that people put the absolute best ever pictures on their profiles.  Like they went to Glamor Shots and then had them retouched.  Most people’s profile pictures will be from some vacation when they have a really good tan, the wind is blowing through their hair, the lighting is just right.  Possibly a night at a bar when they looked especially good, makeup, hair and outfit were all working in unison.   Neck crooked in such a way to stretch out their second chin.  Maybe just a headshot if they don’t want to reveal the shape of the rest of their body.  Possibly a head and chest shot if that’s what’s working. Maybe they had the photo taken in or converted to black and white, hiding even more imperfections.

You’ve went on some of your girl friend’s profiles and been like, “Damn she looks good”.  Well fellas it’s a little but of camera trickery.  They don’t really look that good, but for a split second in time, when the planets aligned correctly, they took some really good pictures.  And it’s not to say they’re not pretty, it’s just that they’re not as pretty as their best picture suggests.

I understand if you are using one of these social networks/dating sites to lure in men or women, I get that.  You’re trying to market yourself to someone else and putting your best stuff up there will maximize your hits or comments or messages or friends.  Makes sense, I guess when I used the social networks I kinda did the same things.

The weirder thing is when non-single women (and men but I really have never perused men’s profiles) continue to put their best pictures on the site for purposes of their own ego, even after they have found their “special someone”.  Crying out for attention, “Hey look at me, I’m pretty“.  Receiving comments, friend requests and messages from random deushe bags telling her so, “Hey girl you look fiyne!  Thanks for the add!“.  Letting her know she’s still got it.  All the while in the back of her head she reasons she can still go out and find another guy if need be and be confident enough to use that pseudo-fact in an arguement with the significant other.

I could be wrong, it could be for a photo competition with their friends.  Her best photo against all her friends best photos, leave each other messages like, “You’re so pretty” and then talk about the person behind their back.  Don’t think this kind of stuff doesn’t happen.

I’ll never get women.  I’m pretty sure if they didn’t have vagina’s I wouldn’t even talk to them.  Maybe to get their opinion on paint colors for a room but that’s about it.  Meanwhile I’m relegated to a life of dealing with them.

On that note I’m getting drunk tonight….

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