Gotcha Snail Mail Spammers

By: picture-2-27-tmBilly BeerSlugger

If you’re like millions of Americans, you’re inundated with Junk Mail in your physical (not email) mailbox everyday.  Everything from Credit Card offers to donation solicitations.

Up until now there’s not really a lot you can do about it.  You could call the company up and tell them to take your name off the mailing list but you are already on a mailing list, whcih has probably been sold 200 times and assimilated into countless other databases.  You’re not going to call every companyyou get mail from and get your name taken off their (single) mailing list.

My mom usually writes “Return to Sender” on the mail and sticks it in the mailbox.  She receives an obscene amount of Donation Solicitation’s from Christian Charities after her name was sold about a billion times.  A couple times I actually saw the mail having a nickel in it.  Something in the mail said that for a nickel a day you can feed xyz children in third world countries.  My problem with that is why are they sending out nickels to people in bulk when they could use these nickels to feed kids?  If a charity has enough money to send nickels out in their mailers then they probably are doing pretty well, at least that’s how I look at it.

Anyway, I think I’ve taken things a step further.  Open up your junk mail and get the “No Postage Necessary” envelope.  Stick anything you want in these envelopes like other junk mail, newspaper clippings, dog hair, unused coupons, parking tickets, anything you want really.

How hilarious is it that you are now sending junk mail to the people who are sending you junk mail.  I often wonder if they are just as disappointed to see my junk mail as I am to see theirs.

Technically, from what I gather, you can tape the “No Postage Necessary” envelope to a box and pretty much mail them anything you want like a brick, rocks or fecal matter.  I have not tried this but for scholastic purposes only I just want you to know that this is an option.

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