billybeerslugger – Page 12

October 1, 2009

Blood Energy Drink

By: Billy BeerSlugger

Blood Energy Drink is a product marketed to the general public but really some marketing guru is trying to take advantage of the movie Twilight and it’s fat girl/skinny girl/ gay guy fan base. It’s an energy drink that has the consistency of blood, the same color of blood, most of the same nutrients as blood and comes in packaging you would find in a hospital. Seriously, what is the world coming to?

Are people really that obsessed with the a vampire movie that they will buy this? I loved the Wesley Snipes movie Blade but I didn’t run out and try to get fang implants or sleep all day in a box with soil from Transylvania. I mean I can see the gothic leaning population loving this shit because they’re a little bat shit to begin with but are the tweens and twenty something fans of twilight going to buy this stuff.

Between Twilight, the HBO show True Blood and some show Vampires Diaries on the WB or whatever the fuck that station is called now, has there ever been a cooler period of time to be a vampire? The only way you could be cooler than being a vampire right now is to be a black rapping Vampire that also happens to be gay. It actually sounds like a great sitcom.

If one were to make a mixed alcoholic shot with this stuff and Jägermeister, what would it be called? A Blood Bomb?

October 1, 2009

The Walmart Dilemma

By: Billy BeerSlugger

You know Walmart, the United States largest retailer, has gotten a lot of bad press lately. I watched a documentary (Wal-Mart: The High Cost of Low Price) a year or so ago about how Walmart was really taking advantage of their employees, not giving overtime and not offering health insurance and the adoption of an anti-union stance. How when a Walmart opens in a small town it can really squeeze local merchants and put them out of business.I’m a sucker for documentary’s and I’ll admit the video had me leaning initially toward boycotting the megastore.

I’ve heard people I know say they won’t go there for these reasons but after a visit to a local Walmart a couple of weeks ago I’m not sure I’ll be one of these people. Not that I make a weekly trip to the retail palace but the prices really are a lot lower than other retailers for certain items. Getting my Old Spice High Endurance deodorant for over $2 less than I would at a place like Rite Aid or CVS. Grabbing a 12 pack of socks for $5.50 and picking up a couple of food items that seemed to be a really good deal opposed to my local supermarket.

First, with the state of the economy and family’s tightening the budgets more and more, what is so wrong saving money? Even if Walmart is treating employees unfairly cannot these people go somewhere else and work if it’s so bad, this is America after all isn’t it? No one is putting a gun to their head and saying they have to work at Walmart.

Second, if Walmart is putting the squeeze on local businesses in towns they open stores in isn’t that in fact good for the consumer? Competition driving down prices. Yes it sucks that local businesses will close due to their inability to compete but innovative and new businesses should spring up in their absence and existing businesses that are able to adapt will also survive. Is not this a Capitalist society? Don’t new businesses spring up every day as well as fold? Isn’t there something to be said about survival of the fittest anymore?

Yes I do care about Walmart workers rights/conditions and I do feel slightly bad for the family’s of the businesses that go under due to direct competition with Walmart but i and the rest of America should be looking out for number one during these rough times. If you can save $20 a week by purchasing items cheaper at Walmart isn’t that $20 more in your pocket? Why should you feel bad about that?

There is something to be said about a monopolistic environment that could be forming where Walmart is the only seller of a specific type of good in a given area but then again if Walmart was pricing these items more expensively than they should another business could challenge for dominance in that particular good, service or sector.

Overall, I’m not a huge fan of Walmart. I’d never buy audio/video equipment there or clothing besides socks and underwear but i don’t really have a problem going and saving money on the items I would buy there and you shouldn’t either.

October 1, 2009

Why Women Have Sex

By: Billy BeerSlugger

In what is easily some of the best reading I’ve done in awhile, I checked out this article from the Guardian in the UK. Lots of stuff I already knew or subconsciously knew but it’s great to have a study behind it because lets face it, what’s opinion without some scientific facts behind it.

No not all women have sex for money: directly or indirectly, some do rather enjoy the experience. Apparently for the enjoyment of it was reason number one.

Some Others included:

promotion
bartering
for revenge
to get back at a partner who has cheated on them
to make their partners feel bad
to make themselves feel good
duty
using sex to get rid of him
to make him jealous

Some interesting concepts included:

“Love” as an Insurance Policy

Saying Love is essentially something that helps ensure your mate won’t leave you. Also goes into the chemicals the brain produces when someone is in love like phenylethylamine, dopamine and norepinephrine which can induce a euphoria like experience. From what I’ve read love is just a chemical reaction.. if you want to believe that.

The Concept of Mate Poaching:

“There isn’t this huge pool of highly desirable men just sitting out there waiting for women.” So how does a woman get the man she desires? We “compete to embody what men want” – high heels to show off our pelvises, lip-gloss to make men think about vagina’s, and we see off our rivals with slander. We spread gossip – “She’s easy!” – because that makes the slandered woman less inviting to men as a long-term partner. She may get short-term genetic benefits but she can sing all night for the resource benefits, like a cat sitting out in the rain. Then – then! – the gossiper mates with the man herself.

The Concept of Mate Guarding:

Women regularly have sex with their mates to stop them seeking it elsewhere. Mate guarding is closely related to “a sense of duty”, a popular reason for sex. “Most of the time I just lie there and make lists in my head. I grunt once in a while so he knows I’m awake, and then I tell him how great it was when it’s over. We are happily married.” Women also Mate Guard by flaunting healthy sexual relationships thus signaling to potential “competition” that her mate has no need to look for sex anywhere else.

The Economics of Sex:

Not just prostitution but handbags, dinner, drugs, jobs but also to get their partner to take out the trash or mow the lawn. Freshman girls will bang fraternity guys and others who can acquire alcohol and get them and their friends drunk for free. However, they also do it for the status of it as well.

Women use sex at every stage of a relationship, “from luring a man into the relationship, to try and keep a man so he is fulfilled and doesn’t stray”.

This just goes on to prove a point my dad told me at an early age, “Women have a gold mine between their legs”. It also goes into my own theory of dating and relationships, once a women begins using sex as leverage to get what she wants you are officially fucked. Once sex between you and a girl you’re dating isn’t just for pleasure it becomes a relationship. It also makes me wonder if the girl is even having sex with you in the beginning under the pretenses of pleasure or just to lure you in as a potential mate. Have I been naive this whole time?

So more or less, women have sex to get what they want. Whether it is to get or keep a man, get monetary, egotistical or otherwise beneficial gain from it or bribe their husband into mowing the lawn. Per this article women are attracted to men with symmetrical features as well as scent (Pheromones?). These features are apparently ingrained in women as a way of choosing a the best sperm to produce her offspring just as a woman with ample breasts, blonde hair and large hips is supposed signs of a good child bearer to a male.

While I’ll never really fully understand women it’s good to know as much as possible about the enemy. This article was definitely an eye opener in terms of motivations behind a woman’s decision to partake in sex.

September 25, 2009September 25, 2009

BeerSlugger.com Getting Social

By: Billy BeerSlugger

We’d like to thank the many BeerSlugger’s out there that support our site and read our crappily written articles.

Being that this is the 22nd century I figured we’d bring BeerSlugger out of the dark ages and allow you guys to use all your little crazy social networks, social bookmarks and all that other bullshit.

So if you’ve got Facebook you can share an article you like by clicking on the icon at the bottom of the post. If you use Digg you can help BeerSlugger.com reach the masses by submitting an article you like by clicking on the dig icon at the bottom of the post. Same goes for Reddit and Yahoo Buzz.

If you are a Technorati user there is an icon on the right column that you can click to make BeerSlugger.com one of your favorite blogs.

We’re not really sure what any of this stuff does but we’ve looked at other blogs and they have the same shit. So in and attempt to be homogeneous and banal we have bowed to the peer pressure, emails and comments and added these features to BeerSlugger.com.

It’s Friday so I’m going to get drunk now. Enjoy your weekend and thanks for logging on.

Sincerely,

William J. BeerSlugger

September 25, 2009September 25, 2009

The Inside Track with Ace Rothstein: 9/25/09

Last week we went 1-2-1. A couple of breaks and we have a monster week. I still believe we were on the right side of the games but that’s why they call it gambling. On to this week.

Fresno St +17 over Cincinnati

Cincinnati has to come home after a tough game on the West Coast and is laying a big number here. They are 2-8 ATS the past 10 games where they are favored by more then 8 points. This Fresno St team is good
and will look to control the clock by running the ball the whole game. Cincinnati played Hawaii in there Bowl game last year and barely got by them. Fresno St is a better and more balanced team then Hawaii. Fresno St covers and has a chance to pull this out in the 4th Quarter.

Illinois +14 over Ohio St

Arrelious Benn is back and so is Illinois passing game. With 2 weeks off Illinois is going to come in on fire and look to take it to one of the best teams in the Big 10. Looking into the numbers Illinois is 8-2
ATS the past 10 where they are a 10-14 point underdog. Illinois is also 6-2 ATS past 8 games vs Ohio St and 4-1 ATS at Ohio St. Look for a upset.

Tennessee +3 over NY Jets

I think Mark Sanchez stinks! He has managed two alright games but has not faced a defense this good ever. The Jets thought last week was their Super Bowl and it will be hard for them to get up again for this game. Tennessee has Super Bowl aspirations and has started the season 0-2. The Titans are 8-2 ATS the past 10 September road games.

Arizona Cardinals -2 1/2 over Indianapolis Colts

The Colts are coming off a huge Monday night win in the heat of South Florida. Now they must travel to Arizona and play against a great offense. The Colt defense was on the field 80% of the game last week, and will be tired by the second half of this one. And we all know what Kurt Warner does against tired defense’s that aren’t rushing. Cards by a TD.

September 25, 2009

Dudes Who Need To Be Fired: NFL Edition

Sports With Bob McFlurry

Here’s My NFL List of 2009 who need to be fired in the sports world whether they deserve it or not:

Head Coaches:

Jack Del Rio: Jacksonville Jaguars

Del Rio has a regular season record of 50-46 with 3 winning seasons in 6 years and two playoff appearances including one playoff win. That coupled with the dismal season they’re probably going to suffer through will not allow Del Rio to keep his job. Unless David Garrard turns into Peyton Manning that is and Maurice Jones Drew can prove he’s an every down back. Bottom line Jack Del Rio is somewhere else next season.

Marvin Lewis: Cincinnati Bengals

Last year 4-11-1, 2oo7 finished 7-9, 8-8 in 2006 after going 11-5 in 2005. Carson Palmer’s health has to do as much with the loses as much as the defense does but ultimately Lewis is responsible because he was brought in to fix the defense. He’s only had one winning season from 2003 to 2008 which means after they don’t make the playoffs this year, the experiment is over.

John Fox: Carolina Panthers

In the mid-2000’s John Fox’ Carolina Panthers were the sexy pick to make the Super Bowl pretty much every preseason. He’s had 3 winning seasons in 7 years and at least has a winning regular season record (63-49). The Panthers went to the Super Bowl in 2003 when their offensive line was all juiced up on steroids and HGH and went to the NFC Championship game in 2005. They also lost last year in the first round of the playoffs to eventual NFC champion Arizona Cardinals. All things considered, even with a winning record in the regular season and a 5-3 record in post season play, John Fox should be fired after this year when the Panthers don’t make the playoffs or lose in the first round again.

Quarterbacks:

Jason Campbell: Washington Redskins

I think the Jason Campbell experiment is just about over. For all his athleticism he’ll never be a good QB in the league. The Redskins severely overpaid to get the 25th pick in the 2005 draft, giving up a 1st, 3rd and 4th round pick to acquire him. He had a good completion percentage last year but didn’t have the TD’s or yards to show for it and he couldn’t carry the team on his back during Clinton Portis’ annual end of season production halt. He’s a game manager and he’s efficient but he’s never going to be a great QB. Though he’d be a good backup somewhere.

Matt Hasselback : Seattle Seahawks

It’s time for Seattle to find a QB of the future and fast. This guy is more injury prone than a elderly hypochondriac living in a run down nursing home. He’s good when healthy but he hasn’t been healthy since their Super Bowl run and Matt’s age is starting to catch up with his prematurely receding hairline.

Jake Delhomme: Carolina Panthers

He’s been serviceable for years and a leader on the field but are the Panthers ever going to win a Championship with this guy. The expectations are usually high for this team and even with a great ground game and great defense he’s never going to get it done. This guy could fuck up a wet dream.

Ownership:

Al Davis: Oakland Raiders

Al needs to go away and I think most of Oakland wishes this would happen. He needs to retire and hand the keys off to someone who isn’t senile. The drafts have been putrid and you change coaches every year. You can’t win that way and it’s very evident. I’m not sure this guy could field a competitive Fantasy Football team let alone a real one.

Daniel Snyder: Washington Redskins

I’m actually fine with D. Snyder captaining that ship down in Washington because the Eagles play them twice a year. Keep spending a kabillion dollars on free-agents that don’t pan out and let down some the best fans in the NFL on an annual basis. The only way this can be fixed is if Snyder takes a back seat and gives total control over to a guy like Bill Cowher, Bill Parcells, Mike Shannahan or some other proven winner. I think his ego is too big for that though.

Everybody In The Front Office: Detroit Lions

It was a step in the right direction sending Matt Millen back to the broadcast booth but I hope they cleaned the rest of the house and not just the attic. It’s easy to pick on the Lions for their ineptitude but there’s a reason for that. Starting in 2003 they drafted Charles Rogers, Roy Williams, Kevin Jones and Mike Williams in the first round. All of these can be considered busts in one form or another and none are even on the Lions roster. In 2006 they finally drafted someone on the defensive side of the ball and then went right back to drafting Wr’s the next year with Calvin Johnson. Johnson may work out but 1 out of 4 ain’t is bad. Again in 2009 they took offensive players in Matthew Stafford and Brandon Pettigrew (TE) in the first round. It’s a wonder their defense is suspect, you can’t develop defensive players if you don’t draft any. Ernie Sims remains the only 1st round draft pick to be spent on a defensive side of the ball in the 2000’s.

September 25, 2009

Mackenzie Phillips Was Banging Her Dad

Credit: Kristin Barlowe; Yvonne Hemsey/Getty Images

By: Billy BeerSlugger

So news came out within the last couple days about how Mackenzie Phillips of 80’s Soap Opera fame and her father of 70’s band Momma’s and the Poppa’s were involved in an incestuous relationship for over ten years. She is going on Oprah to discuss the ordeal and has a book coming out shortly. The first thing that comes to my mind is why ugly ass Mackenzie Phillips and not her way better looking sister Chyna Phillips of early 90’s group Wilson Phillips. Only a truly sick and twisted individual would bang his less good looking daughter.

It’s kind of hilarious how things work in the publishing world. You have celebrities that do fucked up shit and then write a book about it. You have politician’s that do fucked up shit and write a book about it. You have regular people who do fucked up shit, get famous for doing the fucked up shit and then write a book about it. It’s a system that rewards bad behavior with book deals and the general public eats this stuff up like the last slice of pizza on a drunken Friday night after the bars close.

Oh, but don’t forget the talk show tour de’ sympathie and or shame while hawking the book. The absolute pinnacle of this charade being the Oprah show and the obligatory, “…how did that make you feel” question (queue Crocodile Tears!).

Seriously though, what does that say about the person that buys this book? You already know the jist, she was banging her dad for like 10 years. Or does this sick person want to know all the gross details like when it started, what positions they liked or if she came during sex. It’s like an incestuous romance novel but set in real life. I’m going to venture to guess that 98% of the people that buy this book are women who have deep seeded daddy issues and may actually be Jillin’ Off while reading the juicy parts.

I think this just proves that people will do absolutely anything for money. Banged your dad for 10 years, write a book about it. Started banging dudes and got caught while you were the governor, write a book about it. Sell a Senate seat to the highest bidder while Governor and get caught, write a book about it. Bet on Baseball while you’re a manager, get caught, deny it for 20 years then admit to it in a book you wrote about it.

Granted some stories are more compelling than others and while sex definitely sells in our culture you may have to cut off the book deal for people who bang their dad for 10 years and then want to make money off the story.

note: Jillin’ Off is a slang term for female masturbation.

I could have also used:

Hee-Haw with wrinkled Mee-Maw

Muffin Buffin’

Polishing the Pearl

Two Finger Taco Tango

Beat the Beaver

Riding the Unicycle

Play the Clitar

Double Clicking the Mouse

or Fucking Without Complications

September 23, 2009September 23, 2009

Valley Swim Club Racism

By: Billy BeerSlugger

You may have heard this story about a group of 60 kids from a day camp in Philadelphia which was bussed to the Valley Swim Club in Huntingdon Valley PA only to be told not to come back a day later after an emergency board meeting by the swim club.

The story is all over the news and reached national levels even moving Actor/Director Tyler Perry of the Tyler Perry movies to pay for a 3 day stay in Disneyland. There’s no denying that the kids in the day camp are primarily black and that the clientele in the swim club is primarily white. There’s where the story comes from; the sensationalism of racism.

Now the swimming club says they had legitimate crowd concerns which may or may not be true. One of the campers, Dymire Baylor, commented, saying, “I heard this lady, she was like, ‘Uh, what are all these black kids doing here?’ She’s like, ‘I’m scared they might do something to my child.” Two other campers reported strange comments, prompting one to ask, “Am I too black to go into the pool?”.

Well you might just chalk that up to what Obama might call being a “typical white person“. As in there is an inherent reaction to white people that’s “been bred into our experiences that don’t go away and sometimes come out in the wrong way and that’s just the nature of race in our society”. (And he’s right we do have to break through it).

But I digress, the issue here is that the summer camp paid $1,900 to have the 60 kids go to the pool every Monday for 90 minutes for the duration of the summer. I did some math and it essentially breaks down to $2.64 per visit. Now the swim club supposedly received multiple complaints from members leading to the emergency board meeting that terminated the Day Camp membership. I think the economics of this decision are pretty easy. A swimming membership for the summer for one person can range from $300 to $350 in the area for a single person and a family of four can be around $600 – $650. So from an economics standpoint if you lose 5.5 singular memberships or 3 family’s of four due to the kids being there the swim club takes a bit of a bath. Not to mention dealing with the other “typical white” people who don’t relinquish their membership but complain constantly.

This is all conjecture but I’m thinking from a economical and “dealing with bullshit” standpoint, you say let’s give the kids back their money, keep our “typical white” members happy that are our bread and butter. You cite crowd concerns/safety and that’s your alibi. Seems to work for me except maybe the alibi wasn’t airtight and you didn’t count on the national news coverage on your ass and the racist label hung over your Swim Club sign.

There really was no winning angle to be played here. Either lose money and reputation with your members and let the kids stay the summer or refund the money and take whatever the parents, media and Tyler Perry throw at you. It’s sad but the real wrong move was to invite the group at all. Every private swim club board in America has now been served up a lesson in how not to get into a Public Relations nightmare and possibly a $50,000 fine; don’t go out of your way to try and do a good deed and give some underprivileged youngsters a place to swim. So in effect what may seem like a win against racism and anti-civil rights actually just made it ten times harder to get underprivileged kids into nicer private swim clubs. It’s a double edged sword but it looks like the kids are at least going to get $50,000 minus lawyer fees. Hopefully it all goes right to a college education fund, I could get my Michael Phelps on with that scenario. Of course that’s not going to happen.

September 23, 2009

This Guy and That Guy’s Cooking Corner – Shrimp Scampi

Ingredients

• 1 pound penne pasta

• 1/4 cup olive oil

• 1 pound medium uncooked shrimp, peeled, and deveined

• 4 cloves garlic, minced

• 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt, plus extra for seasoning

• 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, plus extra for seasoning

• 1 Cup Sun Dried Tomatoes cut in half

• 1/2 cup chopped fresh basil leaves

• 1/2 cup chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley

• 1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes

• 1 cup white wine (the rest can be given to Mrs. Wineslugger)

• 1/3 cup clam juice

• 3/4 cup heavy whipping cream

• 1/2 cup grated fresh Parmesan

Directions

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil over high heat. Add the pasta and cook until tender but still firm – el dente. Drain the pasta and set aside.

In a large skillet, heat the oil over medium-high heat. Add the shrimp, garlic, 1/2 teaspoon of salt, and 1/2 teaspoon of pepper. Cook, stirring frequently until the shrimp turn pink and are cooked through, about 3 minutes. Remove the shrimp and set aside.

Add the sun dried tomatoes, 1/4 cup basil, 1/4 cup parsley, and the red pepper flakes. Cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Add the wine, clam juice, and heavy cream. Bring the mixture to a boil. Reduce the heat to medium-low and simmer for 7 to 8 minutes until the sauce thickens. Add 1/4 cup of the Parmesan, the cooked shrimp, the cooked pasta, and the remaining herbs. Toss together until all ingredients are coated.

Transfer the pasta to a large serving bowl. Sprinkle with the remaining cheese and serve immediately.

Great date night idea. You can give your Wineslugger the rest of the wine which pairs perfectly with the meal and you can enjoy a nice summer ale (Sam Adams Summer or Sierra Nevada Summer) or a crisp refreshing beer such as a Warsteiner.

September 23, 2009September 23, 2009

Warsteiner – Not your ordinary brewery

warsteiner By: Luan Zuccarello

Warsteiner has been brewing beer since 1753, and is the largest private brewery in Germany. Located right outside of Warstein Germany and in the Rhine Valley, this brewery remained unscathed during the bombings of WWII. The owner Albert Cramer has used the company’s success and good fortune to start a competitive hot air ballooning league in Germany.

I don’t know about you but I would love to see Hammacher and Schlemmer chugging Das Boot and racing hot air balloons. Their Flagship Beer is the Warsteiner Premium Verum and is a pilsner style that is exported to over 60 countries. With an alcohol content of 4.8% it makes for a refreshing and delicious session beer. I have had the privilege to taste more beers in the Warsteiner catalogue and not one of them disappoints.

I tried their Oktoberfest recently, and was quite surprised that is was so light and crisp. Stay tuned for our ROK-toberfest countdown of the top 10 beers of autumn.