By: Bones
I watch a lot of sports, and likewise I read about a lot of sports too. It’s only natural that I have developed strong feelings about certain broadcasters and columnists. This particular article is all about the incompetence and nonsense spewed form the pen of one of the worst columnists in the universe, Gene Wojciechowski. As an avid reader of ESPN.com, this guy is somewhat unavoidable- he writes quite a few columns, but they are such useless drivel I finally stopped reading them all together. I can pretty much get the gist of whomever’s dick he’s sucking from the title of the column anyway- because that’s half of what he does, devotes an entire article to unabashedly slurping someone. The other half of what he does is get up on his high horse and condemn someone. It’s one or the other with this guy, and that pisses me off. There’s no objectivity whatsoever. A typical Gene article reads like this: slurp, slurp, slurp…token 1 or 2 sentence paragraph glossing over reason why what he’s basing his column on might be bullshit, slurp, slurp, slurp. The points he makes are only backed up with jokes (cheesy ones), not facts. He doesn’t do any reporting- his ‘articles’ are always on some widely reported story. It’s like he wakes up, reads the papers, then decides, yeah I can pick a side on that story, take my info from stuff I’ve read, and back it up by never mentioning the other side of things. Supposedly a ‘National’ columnist, he is nothing of the sort. He writes about two things- Chicago and Tiger Woods. He makes a living off of making predictions, being wrong wrong wrong, then writing a column the next day owning up to being wrong, and giving tons of excuses about why he was. He does it so often that I think he writes both columns at once, or writes 2 columns ahead of time- one if he’s right (which never happens) and one if he’s wrong. What bothers me the most is that he seems to think that admitting that he was wrong absolves him from being a clown. And what makes it even worse is that the tone of his articles is always so arrogant, like he could never be wrong. Lets take a trip through his archives to prove my point.
8/13/09– Guarantees Tiger will win PGA after he leads after 54 holes. He didn’t, so…
8/15/09– Writes the obligatory ‘yeah, I was wrong’ article
7/13/09-Slurps Tiger for the British Open. He got cut so…
7/16/09– apologizes
7/6/09– Predicts Cubs will win NL Central by comfortable margin.
Soon- article saying, hey I was wrong, but…gives many excuses.
6/17/09– Slurps Tiger for the US Open… doesn’t happen
6/21/09– I’m wrong.
4/7/09– Slurps Tiger for Masters…are you getting the picture now?
Its not just Tiger, its Favre, or John Madden. It’s almost gay, the tone of these articles. They aren’t ABOUT anything- just about how awesome someone is. Its one thing to be a golf writer and be forced to write about golf. But he can write about whatever he wants and chooses to slurp people. Or maybe he will make a generic bullshit list, like the top 50 such and such. He probably wrote that shit 4 years ago. Look, this isnt one of my stronger articles in terms of logic or reasoning, but I am honestly worked up writing about this tool.
3/2/09– Gene rips Cutler for being a baby
4/2/09– Gene loves Cutler now.
1/21/09– Gene writes article about how wrong his NFL predictions were- a yearly occurrence. “It takes a real man to admit when he is wrong”.
1/11/09– guarantees Eagles to beat AZ in NFC Champ game
1/26/09– Calls AZ ‘no fluke’
OK, Im done, you get the point. I fuckin’ hate this guy, he should be fired.I wouldn’t give him a job to cover high school sports.