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Subjectivity On Infidelity

By: Billy BeerSlugger

Now there have been countless stories in the news about this guy cheating on his wife with that girl.  Stories of infidelity about politicians, sports stars, coaches, teachers, CEO’s and every other walk of life. Lately I’ve been following the Rick Pitino sex scandal from afar. All I know is that he admitted on cheating on his wife with a woman and she was allegedly trying to blackmail him.  But that’s neither here nor there.

You look at the lot of these cases whether in court or portrayed in the media and 99% of them paint the guy in a negative light.  Donald Trump, Frank Gifford, Peter Cook/Kristy Brinkley, Bill Clinton, San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom, Rudy Giuliani, Senator Larry Craig, Jim McGreevy, Eliot Spitzer, Hugh Grant, Jude Law, Usher, Kobe Bryant and the list goes on and on and on. I think one thing is for sure that men (and women) will continue to cheat on their significant others.

That being said, there’s two oddly peculiar cases surrounding cheating that women rarely scoff at. David Beckham and Brad Pitt are two people who (allegedly) cheated on their spouses yet received little to no harm to their careers because of it.  Brad Pitt broke it off with wife Jennifer Aniston to get with Angelina Jolie and David Beckham seems to have been in the news a couple of times for banging random girls.

I’m not sure if these two stars just have great PR teams and were able to quell the backlash or if women generally just did not care that these two guys cheated.  Not to say that the stories were not covered but not in the negativity and public outcry of say a Bill Clinton, Peter Cook or Eliot Spitzer.  Granted some of the political figures involved in sex scandals are makers of public policy and should be held to a higher standard but are not they all human.

Now I’m not advocating cheating or anything of the like, all I’m saying is that it’s weird that if you talk to a girl about Peter Cook who cheated on Kristie Brinkley most will say they hate the guy and think he’s an asshole for cheating on his wife but if you ask the ask the same girl about Brad Pitt they’ll say he’s the hottest man alive and leave out the part that he (allegedly) cheated on Jennifer Anniston.  Is Brad Pitt or David Beckham or any other so called “sexiest man alive” held to a lower standard on the fidelity part of their relationships than the rest of us mortal men?  Does being insanely hot get you a pass in some instances?  I know hot women get passes all the time but does this happen for men too?  I’ll bring this point up to women and some say they don’t care if he cheated that they still love Brad Pitt.

I’d like to hear some comments from men and women on this matter.  Given the same level of marital indiscretion from two men, one being average looking and the other being or Brad Pitt status, does the average looking one receive more heat than the really good looking one? From a mass media standpoint and from a woman’s opinion standpoint?

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Breast Tattoo’s: Just Stop It

breast-tattoos-0708-lgBy: Billy BeerSlugger

I’ve been a fan of the female breast all my life.  From the time I was an infant to this very second, there has not been a day gone by that I have not thought about the abundant beauty that a woman’s opulent chubbies can bring.

It is in men’s DNA to find these womanly chest appendages appealing in nature. Large breasts are supposed to note a higher fertility rate and thus a reason why we men (as animals) are so attracted to them even subconsciously.

Now I’m all for art and it should be taught in schools and all that and I’m all for a womans right to do what they will with their bodies whether it’s abortion or prostitution.  However, do we really need to deface one of the greatest parts of the female body with a tattoo?

I’m not really anti-tattoo even though I myself probably will never get one but can’t women just stick to the tramp-stamp on the back or the shoulder tattoo?  I really don’t care where the tattoo is as long as it’s not on your breast.

The tattoo may seem like a great idea at the time but breasts do tend to sag as you get older.  That rose you got on your left breast may turn into a really really long-stem rose by the time you’re 40, and no one wants to see that.

I’m walking down Chestnut St. today getting lunch and I see a early to mid 30’s lady wearing business attire walking toward me and I’m checking her out then as I get closer she’s got the Eve paw print tattoo on both breasts and I am immediately turned off.  Just another example of perfectly good breasts being ruined by a naive 20 something trying to piss off her dad or trying to show some individuality.  Congratulations, you’ve succeeded in your efforts to look like a skank.

So this is my public service announcement for breast tattoo’s, just don’t do it.

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Professional Athletics and Marijuana in America

The Governator Smoking The Stinky Green
The Governator Smoking The Stinky Green

Bob McFlurry with Sports

So maybe you’ve heard that Jaqua Parker was arrested for possession of marijuana during training camp a day or so ago.  Apparently Todd Herreman’s was driving and there was two young ladies were also in tow when the car was stopped by police.

Now I won’t get into how I think Pot should be decriminalized (which it is in some areas of the U.S) or legalized, but would like to talk about two issues that this situation brings to mind.

1) Juqa Parker made a mistake and probably the only mistake he made was getting caught.  I’ve listened to a lot of 610 WIP over the last couple days with people calling in to bitch and complain about why these professional athletes think they are above the law or don’t have to follow the rules or because they make millions of dollars they should be more responsible.  You know what, I don’t buy that.  The guy smoked some pot, took the edge off of what was probably a tough day at camp.  How many people go to Happy Hour after work to take the edge off every day? Millions? I don’t see Parker’s actions any different than what goes on every day in America other than the fact that marijuana relaxes you and you wake up the next day without a hangover.

And you can claim that these athletes make millions of dollars and with more money comes more responsibility and they should behave better or whatever but I’m really not buying that either.  I remember football camp, it sucked.  You’re out in the heat all day with 20 pounds of equipment on running around doing drill’s, sprint’s, long distance runs, begging for a water break and the coaches are on your ass the whole time. Waking up every day with your muscles sore as shit, dragging your ass to film and meetings, expected to know where you’re supposed to be at all times on every conceivable formation as well as the guy next to you.

Now imagine that it’s not High School anymore and you’re expected to do pretty much super human things everyday, fighting for roster position with all the other Alpha Males and the weight of a championship hungry city on your back.  Like I said some people need to take the edge off and football players are no exception.  Alcohol is pretty much out of the question at training camp unless you’re Maurice Clarrett so what do you do?  Play Madden?

2) Football players are not idiots.  There’s a bigger issue than Juqa Parker getting caught with weed by the police here. It’s the fact that he had weed on him at all.  Why would a player, being apprised of all the rules knowingly and willingly be (allegedly) smoking pot if the league is drug testing.  Now I’m not talking about being Ricky Williams stupid about the mary jane but by most medical accounts marijuana stays in your system for about a month. So I’m going to guess players get tested at the beginning of training camp and I’m not sure what happens after that.  But i know Corell Buckhalter and other Eagles players got detained for allegedly smoking weed on South Street back in 2001 during the season but no one ever tested positive. And there’s been countless other players I’ve seen or heard been vilified on ESPN or wherever for partaking in something that 90% of people have at least tried in their lives.

This leads me to believe that it’s probably pretty naive to think that the Ganja isn’t prevalent in the NFL and probably most other Major sports. Either the players that get caught are just plain stupid for failing a drug test or they are caught by the police with Pot, suggesting they were smoking pot, however, smart enough to avoid testing positive for it.

Whatever the case, it’s not the end of the world. I think that marijuana should  be legal and taxed the shit out of by the government instead of spending Billions of dollars futilely trying to stop it. Of course that’s not up to me and neither is the suspension Juqa Parker could be facing but gimme a break, is it so bad?  Did he kill anyone? Did he have dogs fight each other to the death?

The same people calling into 610 WIP bitching about this are the same people who are going to go in half wasted tomorrow to work. Anyone see the irony here?  Double Standard much? No matter what your job is or how much money you make a job can be stressful. Apples to Apples, what’s the difference?
Internet. Download Managers

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The Post Office

Will Cliff Claven lose his Job?
Will Cliff Claven lose his Job?

By: Billy BeerSlugger

You know I’ve had a beef with the post office for a long time, whether it’s checks in the mail that never get there or arrive a week later than they should, it never seems like these people have their shit together.  To me it is just another vital service for the United States which the government controls, fucks up and annually loses millions of dollars.  I can’t even get a check delivered to me within a week and a half even though it was mailed from less than 20 miles away.  If the government can’t get my mail to me in a timely fashion how am I supposed to expect it will be any better at providing Health Care to the masses? The Government Accountability Office recently commented that, “without major change, the day will soon come when the Postal Service will be unable to pay its bills.”

Benjamin Franklin (my favorite person of all time) is rolling over in his grave on 2nd and Market right now at the state of how bad things have gotten for the service he founded and reared through it’s infancy.

Now the USPS will close as many as 700 Post Offices in an effort to save money.

Here is a list of some of the Post offices in Philadelphia that will be possibly closing in the near future:

PHI-30th Street – MOD PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-ADAMS AVENUE POS – Frankford PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-BOULEVARD STA PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-CASTLE FSTA – Southwark PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-CASTOR AVE. FINA – BLVD PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-FRANKLIN MILLS – Torresdale PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-GIRARD AVE – Spring Garden PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-JOHN WANAMAKER F – WPA PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-MANAYUNK STA PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-MAYFAIR PSTL STO – Holmesburg PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-NICETOWN FSTA PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-OLNEY STA PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-SOMERTON – Bustleton PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-WADSWORTH AVE FS – Market Sq PHILADELPHIA PA
PHI-WISSINOMING STAT – Tacony PHILADELPHIA PA

For a full list of Post Offices around the Country here is the link to a PDF.

That’s 15 Post Offices which may close in the City.  I’m not sure whether to be happy or sad about this.  Is closing Post Offices going to make the mail more efficient and save money?  I guess only time will tell but I’m pretty sure things can’t get much worse than they already are, at least in Philadelphia.

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G.I. Joe

By: Billy BeerSlugger

If you’re like me, you grew up watching cartoons like G.I. Joe, Transformers, Thunder Cats and a host of others that were on Saturday mornings or after school.  It’s nice to see a sort of revival of 80’s nostalgia with Transformers and now G.I. Joe being turned into live action features.

I had a shit ton of G.I Joe figurines and vehicles as a child and usually found myself in frequent battles with the kids down the street. My favorite G.I. Joe probably being Sgt. Slaughter.  I never really understood why it seemed like Cobra Commander was such a pussy with his incessant bitching and ineptness in following through with a well laid plan.  I mean at any point Destro could have taken the reins and pretty much ran shit.

Anyway, the G.I. Joe movie comes out in a couple weeks but a while back I had an affinity for these Public Service announcements that someone did in the early part of the 2000’s; taking actual G.I. Joe PSA animation, manipulating it and dubbing the voices.  The result is some of the funniest shit I’ve ever seen on the inter web.

I’ll embed one of my favorites here and post links under it for your viewing pleasure.

GI Joe – Get Off My Ice
 GI Joe – Reggae
GI Joe – Shhiiiiiiiitttttttt!
GI Joe – Blanco Nino
GI Joe – Don’t Forget Your Sandwiches
GI Joe – Johnny, Do you Play Baseball?
GI Joe – Vest’s are for Pussies!

GI Joe – Wake up on Fire.

This should get you started, I think there’s upwards of 20 of these made by a guy named Fensler. Great productivity killer at work.

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Steroid Overload

espnBy: Bones

Today, it was leaked to the media that Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz are on the list of roughly 100 players who tested positive for steroids in 2003, along with the previously reported Sammy Sosa, A-Rod, Bonds, etc etc. All the sudden it’s like my life and my TV have been rewound to 2 months ago, 5 months ago, a year ago, 4 years ago. I am so sick of having my blissful and endless sports watching interrupted by this bullshit every few months. For the next week I have to watch ESPN trot out a long line of anchors, commentators, and athletes screaming down at us from way up on their high horse about how the game has been disgraced, blah blah blah….over and over. Gammons, Phillips, Kurkjian, Kruk, Player X…rinse, and repeat. How does this affect their Hall of Fame chances? Will you vote for him? Polls, followups, E:60 and Outside the Lines with Bob Ley. Same questions, same answers, over and over. It’s like a bad nightmare that keeps repeating once you fall back asleep. Finally, you aren’t scared anymore, you are just bored. I am not surprised anymore, nor do I care in the least little bit. I do not fucking care. At all.

All I care about is that I am forced to listen to a multi-media blitz of bullshit. It’s making my favorite channel unwatchable, and it pisses me off. The thing that really gets me is that someone is leaking this information strategically; every couple of months new names come out that should not be out, as the ‘list’ is in the hands of the FBI and supposedly is on double top secret probation. Except that someone who has access to the list is doling out one or two names at a time. Whoever it is obviously is very smart, and and very vindictive. They know that the best way to hurt MLB and each player on the list is to give them the slow drip of Chinese water torture every few months. Someone didn’t happen across the list in Stu Scott’s trash can, and it’s not written on bathroom stall wall- otherwise all the names would be out, and whoever it is hasn’t been fired or caught, or left a trail, or anything. Different sources get the scoop each time, so that tells me that they don’t even know who is leaking the information to them.

The most amazing thing is that the people who are getting outed are the ones who have most recently came out and said something to the effect that they didn’t do ‘roids, or that people should be punished who did do them, etc. Sosa, Ramirez, Papi, ARod, Bonds…all of them denied it, and this guy is obviously trying to make them look silly. It makes you wonder whether the next bomb will be Pujols or Ichiro. But really, I don’t think I am the only one who is sick of it, or has stopped caring who cheated and who didn’t. You can’t keep an entire generation out of the HOF. There was the live ball era, the dead ball era, and now there’s the steroid era, and stats and records fluctuated as such each time. I think its pretty dumb that record holders, players with great careers steroids or not, are not in or may never get in. The records stand as far as MLB is concerned, so the voters should recognize those who set them.

Ugh. I am tired of writing about this, or thinking about it, or watching it on TV. Why doesn’t ESPN come out with an ESPNLegal channel for all this shit? Keep the games separate from everything else- ‘roids, trials, Vick, Burress, and Brett fucking Favre. See which one has the higher ratings. I bet I know which one

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Making it Rain – The Pacman Jones Story

By: Billy BeerSlugger

You know I think Pacman Jones gets a bad rap. Arent you allowed to punch women in the face if you’re throwing money on them, AKA Making it Rain?

This video is astonishing to me.  Not only does it have Pacman, but rap stars Nelly and Jermaine Dupri.  Jermaine Dupri even gets on the DJ’s mic to tell the girls to keep dancing and not bend down to pick up the money that had just rained down on them. Boxer Zab Judah and Houston Texans WR Andre Johnson were there but not in the video.

What may be even more astonishing is how someone had a video camera inside a strip club and didn’t get kicked out immediately.  I know because I’ve tried this.

Overall it’s a glimpse into the lives of people that really Make it Rain instead of Make it Flurry.  I’ve seen a guy drop about $200 in $1 bills on a girl before but that’s nothing compared to the tens of thousands of dollars in the air that night in Las Vegas.

They say Pacman brought in a bag with about $100,000 with him into the strip club and then you wonder how some athletes go bankrupt after they’re done playing.  Then these athletes blame it on anyone but themselves: the league, the cars, the entourage and somehow we’re supposed to fell sorry for them.

Not that strippers don’t need the money, someone’s gotta put those girls through college right?  But what would possess someone to throw thousands of dollars at naked women, I could see a couple hundred or so and the novelty would wear off and it would just be wasting money after that.  Of course I don’t make millions of dollars so I might think differently if I played in the NFL or was a rap mogul.

The good thing is that the girls got paid and the bad thing is that later on that night a strip club employee was shot and paralyzed and this is why Pacman Jones got suspended from the NFL.  Not only that he continues to get into trouble as seen last season when he got into an altercation with a body guard who was appointed by the Cowboys to stop him from getting into trouble.

People are a product of their environment and from what I hear Pacman didn’t exactly have a great childhood but somewhere you have to start blaming things on yourself if shit keeps going bad.  And if he set people up to be murdered etc, the guy should be in jail.  This isn’t the Soprano’s, you can’t just go around killing people that you don’t like.

I’m sure he’ll get another shot at the NFL though, once he finds or pretends to find God and reforms himself.  What a great comeback story that would be.

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Texts From Last Night

By: Billy BeerSlugger

You know I was originally enthralled at the time wasting entertainment website called textsfromlastnight.com.  I would go on there and have a good laugh about text messages of drunken adventures and other generally comical happenings.

However, something clicked inside my head recently that I’m pretty sure I’m not going to follow TFLN as closely anymore and it’s not because I want to stop wasting time and be more productive or any crap like that.

I think I’m a little aghast at peering inside the text messages of girls talking to their girlfriends.  Man jokes like ” I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina” and “Her vagina looked like Bernie Madoff ” are hilarious to me.  I get them because I’m a man and this is the way I also think.  I’ve been on the sending and receiving end of these kinds of texts and my friends and I get a good chuckle out of them.  The text messages about drunken behavior not remembered by the person who did it is funny regardless of sex.

However, what I can’t look past anymore is the glimpse into Girls talking to other girls about what slutty situation precluded getting jizz in her hair or how they have to get a pregnancy test or how big their crap was.  Some things it’s better that men just aren’t privy to.

Now I know the HBO series Sex and the City kind of broke barriers in terms of the new millennium “Girl Talk” and ushered in a sort of sexual revolution where it’s a little more socially accepted for women to be a little promiscuous.  I’m not against girls getting what they want, sexually or otherwise but I’d rather not read or hear about the more disgusting and pig-like scenarios of the gender that is supposed to be better than men in that department.  I talked to a couple of girls and they say that they talk sort of like men when we’re not around.  A little more raunchy, a little less reserved, a little more Sex and the City.

So this brings me back to my revelation about textsfromlastnight.com the other day and why I’m semi-boycotting it.  All these girls and all their slutty stories about getting jizz in their hair and banging random dudes and broken moral compasses just make me sad. WHY?  Because someone is going to marry these girls, one of these girls I may date unsuspectingly.  It makes me a little angry to think that if I ever do get married, some douchebag could be roasting my future wife at this very moment and the funny story from it I could be reading on textsfromlastnight.com in my not so free time.  Who’s laughing then?

It may be a little bit hypocritical to like the guy sex stories and hate the girl sex stories but I just expect better out of women…. and if you’re a woman, you should too.

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Michael Jackson

amd_thrillerBy: Luan Zuccarello

You can think what you want about Michael Jackson but there is no denying his talent. The biggest selling album of all time, biggest crowd to see a concert, biggest video of all time, and 8 grammy’s in one night. He made MTV into what it used to be – A station dedicated to the art form of the music video. He gave us the moonwalk, the robot, and influenced dance for generations to come. Sure I would love to sit here and ridicule and bash the decisions and lifestyle of the man but I don’t think this is the time or place. Instead I would like to celebrate one of the greatest talents of our generation and the biggest pop star ever.

The Jackson 5 made their debut on “The Ed Sullivan Show,” in 1970, performing “ABC.” Much like the Beatle’s, years before, Michael Jackson was an instant success. At 10 years old Michael, sang and danced like a seasoned performer, and won the hearts of not just America but the World. Michael got older and like all good bands, The Jackson 5 folded. He then embarked on the most successful solo career anyone has ever seen. Some highlights include: Starring in “The Wiz” (the black Wizard of OZ), the release of “Thriller” in which he financed with a million dollars of his own money, Induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame – twice, 13 Grammy Awards, and 13 number one singles.

Michael Jackson’s voice and sound was something no one had heard before. People have tried to copy but without much success his signature riffs and high notes. You know the one, you have done it too. You kick your leg and grab your crotch. He could sing Motown, ballads, and pop songs. He stretched the range of his talent and creativity and we have a wonderful catalogue of songs and videos because of him.

One great drunk debate that Beerslugger and myself often find ourselves in is: who is the best lead performer on stage? We usually throw out the obvious ones Axl Rose and Mick Jagger. But that got me to thinking, Michael Jackson might be the best performer in concert ever. The effects and productions he put on were so over the top and outrageous that I don’t think they can ever be duplicated. The guy actually put a jet pack on and flew off stage during a concert. Millions upon millions have packed arenas to cry and scream hysterically at the sight of him.
I finish on this note. I am a Michael Jackson fan, I’m not scared to admit it. However this dude has been dead to me for the last 10 years. I do feel bad he died but I am glad at the same time. Along with the all the bad and horrible things that are going to be brought up surrounding his death, his music and artistry will be showcased. Perhaps, this will make people remember the talent that was Michael Jackson.

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911 Calls

9111By: Billy BeerSlugger

What’s up with the Police or whomever releasing 911 calls to news stations and entertainment websites like TMZ.com?  You would think that these calls would be considered private between the caller and the personnel at Emergency Services.  Who authorizes these calls to be released to these news and entertainment outlets or are they just leaked.  If they are leaked these people need to be fired.

Imagine you are a quasi-celebrity and something terrible happens to you or a friend or family member.  Do you want the whole world to hear a broadcast of the 911 call detailing the emergency and the frightened people trying to get help?  Do you want your family crisis to be exploited for ratings on the news?

It’s standard these days that when a person of note passes away suddenly that the 911 tape is released.  It’s “Breaking News” when the networks receive the tape.  “Next, the frantic 911 call trying to get Michael Jackson help!”.

Caller: He’s not breathing.

911: Ok, help is on the way.

Is this really necessary?  I know these news networks have 24 hours a day to fill with stories but I think some things are better left private.  What possibly does this contribute to the news story?  I know people are obsessed with some stories as evident by news stations covering kidnappings, lost persons and celebrity deaths and the 911 replay is just another way of keeping you glued to the station between commercial breaks but why does the general public need to hear the 911 call.  If things are still under investigation then I think that only the investigating party should have access to these calls.

Just doesn’t make sense to me but then again a lot of things, especially in mass media, do not make sense to me.

But I could be wrong….